Hello everyone to whoever is reading my blog haha.

This week has been the worst week ever for me. Basically, my grandma is going to pass away, and my parents are going to separate really soon. My mom needs my support to be able to carry on taking care of the 3 kids + grandma, since my dad is absent from our lives (in fact, he's a burden). But, I too really need support. I am trying my best.

Rushed down to the hospital anxiously after school after hearing my grandma's in critical condition. The doc says she might go into coma any time, and will leave to be with the Lord very soon. She was really frail, looking at a small & thin body lying on the seemingly huge hospital bed. She could not talk much, and could barely open her eyes. The doctor had found out that a tumour/growth of some sort had burst in her brain & there was bleeding. This explained the headaches that my grandma had been experiencing, and she says they were so painful she wanted to knock her head against the wall. :'(

I held her hand today at the hospital and it was really warm. I told myself, very shortly, I would not get the chance to feel her warm hands anymore. I called out to her, and she recognised my voice. She opened her right eye, she could not see me clearly. She was looking at a space to my left rather than looking at me. Her deterioration in merely two days really saddened me. Although she was suffering, she used up every once of her strength to open her eyes slightly to greet that person. She was really suffering.

My grandma is the type of person that does not complain about anything, just wanting peace and harmony in the family. She would rather sacrifice herself than create any trouble or strife within her community and family. For anyone who has met my grandma before, you would describe her as the friendliest grandma ever. She would offer you food and drinks non-stop (sometimes over friendly haha). She cooks the best chicken rice, the best home cooked food.

Today, I remembered the first memory I had of her. It was the time my mom and dad had separated and we lived in a condo. My grandma had come to help take care of us. She would send me to primary school everyday, and when we passed by the mall, she would treat me to my favourite apple strudel from Delifrance. It was expensive but she still always treated me just to make me happy.

Such memories are beautiful, but they really hurt at the same time. When I think of such incidents, I would tear up quite badly, but they make me smile as well. This can be said to be the first time a close relative to me is going to pass away. I don't know how I am going to handle it when the day comes, but for now, I'll choose to trust in the Lord, and borrow His strength to support my mom.

The Lord has been so good to my grandma and my family, words fail to describe the kind of gratitude I have for God. Without You Lord, none of these miracles would have happened. Thank You Lord Jesus. I love You.

I will always remember my grandma, and I will always love her.